Nothing Compares

Mortifying

Here is a new word for you; Mortification. It comes with the idea that you battle ones sin; inner battle of the flesh, on your own strength trying to achieve the holiness of religion. I would have never thought of myself as such but when you take inventory of yourself, I saw a works based faith rather than an obedient faith. Yes, we have a responsibilty to put to death our old ways; but true mortifucation must be done under the strength and direction of the Holy Spirit. Sanctification happens when you are obedient, not a self-reliant war within yourself.

I knew works were nothing if it did not come out of faith, but just because you know it, doesn't mean you are following it.

Dig deep within yourself

Security in our most falible sense.

In my pursuit of following Jesus in its purest form, there has been an awareness of how much a false sense of security I have had in my faith. As you grow up you have a belief that your dad is the strongest guy alive. He can solve anything; but when you become a dad, you are aware you don't know jack. When you a teenager you have a feeling that you have it figured out, then you hit about 25 and that idea goes south quick.

My question is; when will I grow up in my faith and have that clarity moment? I had a belief growing up that if you didn't go to my church, you were a second rate christian, or my denomination for that matter. If you didn't worship God like me you were missing out. Why did I have that belief when other christians had that same thought toward me? If it were up to us individuals, I think heaven would be lonely; you would be the only one in heaven along with some poeple form your church. Which isn't reality. What it is I don't know with my fickle mind.

I am in pursuit of this clarity of holiness. I know what the bible says and I believe it but what does it look like in your head. I can't quit seem to get through all the preconceived ideas from when I was a child.

What we think and believe is a twisted version from scripture sometimes. We have a belief that we hold onto, a belief we have partially made up from scripture and our own reason, and thats our theology. Pretty messed up, but we believe in our hearts that its right, becuase we got it from scripture, but more or less its the enemy has decieved us. Taking a few lines of scripture and turning it into a dogmatic belief when we have not taken the time to study and research the text.

I believe that a false sense of security plagues us all; we rely lazily on grace in case we are wrong, but we have missed out on the true life-giving breath of the scripture, because we didn't dig past our superficial english language and get to the heart of the Holy Word. How dare we defend our customized theology on lazy findings.

Dig deep and don't stop.

Rob

A Change of Kingdoms

First of all, I need to say that I found this title in the chapter of my book. I didn't come up with it. Anyways, this pursuit of holiness (current book I am reading) ,really used to be a tiresome chase. Always evading me, operating under my own will power. It has taken me some time to really get this; Spending time in his presence really does change you, and fasting during this process really digs deep within your soul.

This chapter is all about going from the Kingdom of Sin to the Kingdom of God, which is grace, love, and hope. Sin will always be chasing us. It is a law of the flesh working with our natural instincts to be used in a manner other than its purpose. It's a war in the spirit realm. If you are tired of battling with sin, that is a good indication that you are not living in Christ and you are doing it on your own. It has taken me some time to get this clear in my head. It took some prayer and fasting.

Even though we all will struggle with sin; laying down the old self, which always wants to come back up, is a daily thing. Paul says "not to let it reign in your body", meaning don't let it grow and feed it. Soon enough it will be a habitual thing, again.

Sin no longer has power over us. If you are in Christ, you know the difference of holiness and sin. You now have a choice, when before you didn't. You may have had a selfish view of sin. You have tried to overcome it, but you forgot that is already done for you. Our responsibility is how we respond to temptation. Here is some advice.

1. Just stop fighting it.
Get your focus on God. Pray and fast. Some sins you can't get control of until you fast. I had to ask God for the desire to stop "cherished sins" in my heart. You may have to do the same. Then however long that takes, ask Him to give you a desire for holiness.

2. Focus on your relationship with the Lord
Again, stop fighting and rest in the victory that Lord has already won. There is nothing you can do that can make God be impressed with you. Actually, us trying to be holy under our own power is a putrid stench to God, because through our actions we are saying what Christ did wasn't enough. He wants us to know that you are Holy and being perfected day by day. Walk the journey.

3. Accountability
I know you have heard this before and It didn't work. Well, I would say it didn't work because you were not truthful with your accountability partner and you didn't meet regularly. This is a discipline in itself. I would suggest that if you have a hard time with accountability, then ask a strong believer to hold you accountable. Like a pastor, mentor, or a church member.


This stuff works. It is practical. I thought for so long that it didn't, but I see now that it was me trying to do it myself rather than focusing on God. I had to ask God to help me understand some basic things. I needed to practice the basics and understand them.

Send me a question anytime you need.

Live Deep.

Rob

What I thought...it wasn't

I believe most of us have a decent and balanced view of ourselves. At least in our own heads. You don't know if your cool but you know you are not a real dorky weird person. Your average, when it comes to the real world, but in our own minds; we are cool, have great ideas, always right, and qualified at any job you want to have. See, even now can't you tell what I think in my own mind. Its okay, we all do it. We all think of ourselves more highly that we ought too.

I took this to a deeper level some weeks ago. I was really bothered by my own self. Believing that I was more of a Godly man, husband, and father, than I really was. Mediocre came to my mind and it really bothered me, to the core. It shook me, scared me, even put some "fear of the Lord" in me. Not fear of going to hell, but it was the glory of God that I wanted to see; then I read a chapter in "Pursuit of Happiness" by Jerry Bridges, and a verse caught my attention; "Make every effort to I've in peace with all men and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord." I am not going to go into all the the commentary on this verse, but I will say it shed some light on my spiritual condition. I had bought into the lie that I was good spiritually, when really I was mediocre, going stagnant.
I saw that I needed to take responsibility for my own sin; stop justifying some "cherished sins in my life", as King David put it in Psalm 66:18.
This journey is going from the outer court of the Temple grounds, into the inner Courts. Past what is unknown; Priestly courts then the Holy of Holies. Even the Priestly Courts will be mostly foreign to me. I may have only seen inside for just a small while. Each court and room is smaller, and the smaller it is, the more dedication and faith is required, for the lack of better terms. This will be a journey of humbled brokenness.

Live Deep.

Walls, Sand, and Stories

Today, an older gentlemen with his wife, slowly pulled up to the house. As got out, he looked around as he strangely made this place familiar. He looked at the changed surroundings, imagining what it was 80 years ago. It was a worlds difference from what it is now. History has been played out, and from this house, so much of it is unknown. Being gone for more the a half century, you wonder if your beginning abode is still there. Does it look similar to what it was, so many years ago? To much of his joy, it was still here. Harbouring a new and young family. "Still in good shape with some modifications:", he said.

He introduced himself to me, Robert was his name; ironic as I introduced myself as "Rob Kelsey". We invited him in, and no sooner he stepped in the door he pointed to my wife and I's room, "I was born in that room", he said. Looking around, he took pictures of our backyard, you could tell he was happy to see it again, "for the last time", he said. Walking around the yard he showed me where the rose bushes were and where his grandmother picked raspberries. Coming here was like a scene in "Citizen Kane", where he recalls moments from being a child in the house where he was born.

As quickly as he came, he left with a smile and a few pictures of a memory.

If walls could talk, I believe the story they would tell would touch every emotion of the human psyche. They tie peoples lives together. Our stories are connected but for the most part, unshared. Sad really, walls, just like sand, contain the stories of many lives that move to and fro on this earth. I was lucky to hear a small story of this man's beginning. A privileged it is to have met him. Thank you Robert for coming by and sharing your story with me and my family, I wish we all could have sat down for coffee and shared more. Best wishes to you and your family.

Robert said that he has been living in Arizona.

Funny Part of my life

Do you have a funny story of your life that also haunts you when you encounter an object that reminds you of that event? Mine is peas. Yes, the little green vegetable that was once told to "put hair on my chest". What if I didn't want hair on my chest? A daunting question for a young boy of 10 years old.
This little green vegetable is a part of my life in a way that ties my sister and I together; blood line is just the beginning. This weapon of torment, the pea, is healthy in one sense, but used in the wrong way can have stomach-churning consequences. I do eat it to this day but for years, from that one event at the dinner table, I haven't touched since my late teens, possibly early twenties. I was sitting there eating dinner when I grabbed that last bit of peas; unknowingly my oldest sister wanted them as well. I took a few bites and decided I was done. Being the artist I am, I thought I would try and create the "Mona Lisa" in vegetable form. My sister didn't like my art; jealous of my rise to vegetable stardom, the master piece, full of other condiments and textures, was viciously crammed down my throat. Strong she was, her hand never moved but by my own hand I ate every last pea concoction on the plate. Eating art never sets well on the stomach.

I can't look at a pea the same. I do like to eat them, but nevertheless I have been ever so shaped by the pea...and my sister.